January 8th 2007, the day after my accident. The day the Earth stood still for me at least. I guess to tell you my lifetime moment I should give a short and sweet background. I was living in Reno at the time. Working at a Retirement Home and had a handful of season passes to the different mountains surrounding Lake Tahoe.
It snowed a few inches the day of January 6th, I got work off for January 7th to go ride at Northstar. I rode the day away. Then on the last run of my day, but not the last run I wanted my day to end on, I was hit. I was hit and flipped and broken, by some crazy Raiders fan from Oakland, CA. But i didn't know it. I had no idea what had happen to me.
Flash forward.
January 8th, 2007. I walk into work. But I was not scheduled for work. The nurse at the retirement home sees me walking around and asks me about my day snowboarding. "I haven't been yet, I'm supposed to go tomorrow." I was convinced that I hadn't been to Northstar, and that the day was Thursday not Saturday. I lost an entire day of my life without even knowing it!
So the moment of a lifetime came when I was strapped to a hospital gurney with my body completely immobilized, and a shot of morphine running through my veins. I had just gotten out of the CAT scan room where they had taken pictures of my brain. I over hear Mr. MD say,
"Her brain seems to be swelling, we might need to open her up and give the brain some room."
At that moment, I had the most surreal feeling flood my body. Words cannot explain. Tears began to stream down my face, no sound came with the tears, simply tears, tears, and more tears.
"What's wrong dear?" The nurse asked ever so politely. Silence, I had no words, I had only thoughts. Tears kept pouring out of my eyes. I couldn't stop them.
Finally, with my head stationary, and my mind focused on the one sentence I never thought I would truly ask another person, I asked the nurse, "Am I gonna die?" Her eyes widened and her mouth fell slightly open. I would hope that her training, she would have come across a book of questions like mine, and how to address the person behind the question.
"Don't you worry, you need to rest."
THAT'S IT! That's all that lady has to say to me! You need to rest! Well obviously I need to, and my body can't do much but rest when it's strapped to a wood-plank and a halo is placed around my head, with a shot of morphine forcing me to relax! The tears kept flowing. I was all alone, there was no one, no one to experience the inner thoughts, no one to pull those thoughts out of me. I was trapped, in the hospital and in my mind.
After what seemed like a lifetime and more, Mr. MD came in to talk about what was happening with me. My brain though it was swollen from the impact of hitting the front and back of my skull a number of times, had stopped, and there was just enough room to not have to saw my head open, exposing all my thoughts to the toxic air floating around that wretched hospital. I was held for a while longer, then sent home to enjoy my life.
Turns out they were so concerned with my brain, they forgot to check the point of contact, my back had been fractured. Needless to say I have not been back to that same hospital since. One lifetime moment was good enough for me. I was treated for my back, and now I have nightmares of Swollen Brains in Raiders Jackets flying down the mountain straight for me.
~L.
At that moment, I had the most surreal feeling flood my body. Words cannot explain. Tears began to stream down my face, no sound came with the tears, simply tears, tears, and more tears.
"What's wrong dear?" The nurse asked ever so politely. Silence, I had no words, I had only thoughts. Tears kept pouring out of my eyes. I couldn't stop them.
Finally, with my head stationary, and my mind focused on the one sentence I never thought I would truly ask another person, I asked the nurse, "Am I gonna die?" Her eyes widened and her mouth fell slightly open. I would hope that her training, she would have come across a book of questions like mine, and how to address the person behind the question.
"Don't you worry, you need to rest."
THAT'S IT! That's all that lady has to say to me! You need to rest! Well obviously I need to, and my body can't do much but rest when it's strapped to a wood-plank and a halo is placed around my head, with a shot of morphine forcing me to relax! The tears kept flowing. I was all alone, there was no one, no one to experience the inner thoughts, no one to pull those thoughts out of me. I was trapped, in the hospital and in my mind.
After what seemed like a lifetime and more, Mr. MD came in to talk about what was happening with me. My brain though it was swollen from the impact of hitting the front and back of my skull a number of times, had stopped, and there was just enough room to not have to saw my head open, exposing all my thoughts to the toxic air floating around that wretched hospital. I was held for a while longer, then sent home to enjoy my life.
Turns out they were so concerned with my brain, they forgot to check the point of contact, my back had been fractured. Needless to say I have not been back to that same hospital since. One lifetime moment was good enough for me. I was treated for my back, and now I have nightmares of Swollen Brains in Raiders Jackets flying down the mountain straight for me.
~L.
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